thurdsay/the return
thursday – woke up and breakfasted in the hotel restaurant before boarding busses bound for our champion air flight. then the shit began to fly. chinese whispers or no, it sounds like we’re on our way to a war-zone. the mayor is on tv talking about br not becoming a lawless city. that’s not a good thing to hear. betsy and lawrence have no power in their buildings so they’ll be staying with me and graham. people are being jacked for water and diapers and shit. it’s like an old west frontier town/refugee camp and the first thing on the agenda when we land, if we ever take off (champion may refer to their status w/r/t mechanical difficulties, it now appears), is to git us some firearms. mikey asks, pack heat on set? pack heat in fucking bed, i say. pack heat everywhere.
the busses are standing by in the lot outside the charter terminal, i assume to truck us back to the omni before they send us all back home so we can survive and live to make another film.
no one thinks we should be going back. and yes, that includes me.
champion is my champion if... oops, they’re not. here we board. off to the capillaries of darkness.
it’s as if we’re a team of relief workers being flown into this devastated area, except we’re actually just going to try to avoid the entire reality of the situation, in the interest of making a movie.
sick.
doesn’t seem like herb’s going to be making a speech on this particular flight. what would he say, after all? oh, maybe this:
“I would like to let you all know that I appreciate your patience in dealing with our scheduling disruption. I know it can be difficult not knowing from day to day where you will be sleeping and when you can get back to work, so thank you again for how well you handled that. Now we are headed back, moving on, and this film will be made, come hell or high water... Oh yeah, it came... So, right... Anyway, we’ve got kevlar body armor on order and we’ll be issuing assault rifles to all of the PAs and drivers. the rest of the crew will be receiving sidearms. you can choose between a variety of 9mm semi-automatic pieces and some larger caliber six-shooter types. for those of you without power in your apartments, you may be thinking that this is a bad thing, but i assure you it is not, as it lessens the chances of your residence being “house-jacked” by displaced refugee families with nothing to lose. for those of you with electricity, may i suggest that you do not ever have your lights on, as that would indicate to potential usurpers that it is a place of energy. oh wait, maybe you should have lights so desperate refugees who couldn’t care less about power and are merely seeking shelter won’t just barge in thinking the place vacant. i don’t know. i guess i’ll just leave that decision up to you. as far as food and water is concerned, it’s sort of catch as catch can around most of southern louisiana. so good luck, but make sure to save some rounds for the heavily armed roving gangs of looters. once again, thanks for bearing with us. i really appreciate how we’ve all stuck together... which reminds me, we should all use the buddy system when out on these lalwless streets. so, thank you, good luck... i think that’s it. let’s make a movie!”
and then, as we’re on our approach, he actually does make a speech, mentions the buddy system, says there are problems near the tent-city downtown and that we should avoid it, but mostly what concerns him is that he won’t be able to visit the casino. he ends it with an honest-sounding statement about if conditions deteriorate, we’ll reconsider our plan, but for now “let’s do what we do.”
as soon as we disembark, our bus driver at the airport tells us to get in our cars and go immediately home without stopping anywhere or setting foot outside thereafter. “lock your doors.”
back at the reserve, all seems well. ac cranks, cable transmits, water runs.
i will play a little basketball and then eat at hooters? i guess?
i learn i won’t be paid, like the check won’t even go out until the end of next week. so i won’t have the money in my account for two weeks, which cuts my credit card payments pretty close. as it stands now, once my rent check is deposited and my coned and citi and amex payments go through, i’ll have 30 dollars more than my account minimum. tight is how i like it. of course, soon after i’ll be rich.
i shoot with ross and he shreds me four consecutive matches of horse. my knee hurts. i have to get that fucking brace. then it is hooters indeed. no one shoots or rapes us. it seems the whole chaos theory was a bunch of fucking hoo-hah.
now tired. gotta get up early for potential shoot tomorrow. documenting the damage assessment. yippee. yahoo. then it’ll be budget party-time for the big holiday weekend.
also, i will shred ross on the court tomorrow.
just realized i might run out of valium on this job – a catastrophe on par with the city of new orleans.
the busses are standing by in the lot outside the charter terminal, i assume to truck us back to the omni before they send us all back home so we can survive and live to make another film.
no one thinks we should be going back. and yes, that includes me.
champion is my champion if... oops, they’re not. here we board. off to the capillaries of darkness.
it’s as if we’re a team of relief workers being flown into this devastated area, except we’re actually just going to try to avoid the entire reality of the situation, in the interest of making a movie.
sick.
doesn’t seem like herb’s going to be making a speech on this particular flight. what would he say, after all? oh, maybe this:
“I would like to let you all know that I appreciate your patience in dealing with our scheduling disruption. I know it can be difficult not knowing from day to day where you will be sleeping and when you can get back to work, so thank you again for how well you handled that. Now we are headed back, moving on, and this film will be made, come hell or high water... Oh yeah, it came... So, right... Anyway, we’ve got kevlar body armor on order and we’ll be issuing assault rifles to all of the PAs and drivers. the rest of the crew will be receiving sidearms. you can choose between a variety of 9mm semi-automatic pieces and some larger caliber six-shooter types. for those of you without power in your apartments, you may be thinking that this is a bad thing, but i assure you it is not, as it lessens the chances of your residence being “house-jacked” by displaced refugee families with nothing to lose. for those of you with electricity, may i suggest that you do not ever have your lights on, as that would indicate to potential usurpers that it is a place of energy. oh wait, maybe you should have lights so desperate refugees who couldn’t care less about power and are merely seeking shelter won’t just barge in thinking the place vacant. i don’t know. i guess i’ll just leave that decision up to you. as far as food and water is concerned, it’s sort of catch as catch can around most of southern louisiana. so good luck, but make sure to save some rounds for the heavily armed roving gangs of looters. once again, thanks for bearing with us. i really appreciate how we’ve all stuck together... which reminds me, we should all use the buddy system when out on these lalwless streets. so, thank you, good luck... i think that’s it. let’s make a movie!”
and then, as we’re on our approach, he actually does make a speech, mentions the buddy system, says there are problems near the tent-city downtown and that we should avoid it, but mostly what concerns him is that he won’t be able to visit the casino. he ends it with an honest-sounding statement about if conditions deteriorate, we’ll reconsider our plan, but for now “let’s do what we do.”
as soon as we disembark, our bus driver at the airport tells us to get in our cars and go immediately home without stopping anywhere or setting foot outside thereafter. “lock your doors.”
back at the reserve, all seems well. ac cranks, cable transmits, water runs.
i will play a little basketball and then eat at hooters? i guess?
i learn i won’t be paid, like the check won’t even go out until the end of next week. so i won’t have the money in my account for two weeks, which cuts my credit card payments pretty close. as it stands now, once my rent check is deposited and my coned and citi and amex payments go through, i’ll have 30 dollars more than my account minimum. tight is how i like it. of course, soon after i’ll be rich.
i shoot with ross and he shreds me four consecutive matches of horse. my knee hurts. i have to get that fucking brace. then it is hooters indeed. no one shoots or rapes us. it seems the whole chaos theory was a bunch of fucking hoo-hah.
now tired. gotta get up early for potential shoot tomorrow. documenting the damage assessment. yippee. yahoo. then it’ll be budget party-time for the big holiday weekend.
also, i will shred ross on the court tomorrow.
just realized i might run out of valium on this job – a catastrophe on par with the city of new orleans.
posted by josh at 11:32 AM
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